A few weeks ago, my cousin Lianne told me she was going to
be editing Rare Rising Stars this year and she�d like me to write
something. She told me she wanted me to write about why Rare
Rising Stars is important. About why it matters.
I can�t say why Rare Rising Stars matters to other people, but I
can tell you why it matters to me.
Rare Rising Stars matters to me because I am a black man
growing up in New Cross and I live in a three bedroom house
with four of my five siblings. I�m autistic. My dad isn�t around.
It matters to me because it�s the 21st century and sometimes
we don�t have electricity, or food in the fridge, or hot water.
Sometimes I can�t wash. It matters to me because sometimes
I forget that the mad characters I see hanging around outside
the bookies in Deptford High Street aren�t normal. It matters
because, in spite of all of this, I went to university and got
a degree.
It matters because, in 2010, I started my own clothing label,
Raw Arm, with my friend Jack and our snap backs were in Flava
Magazine�s Top Five Independent Clothing Brands of the Year. It
matters because, as we developed, the clothing brand became
our personal diary. Each design tells a story about our personal
struggles. A hungry dog. Fagin. A doctor inserting a chip into
someone�s brain. It matters because we lost momentum whilst
I was doing my degree and we�ve decided that we are going
to try, one more time, to come back really strong. Because,
even though we�re broke and don�t have the money to make it
happen, we love it and we�re going to give it one more go.
Rare Rising Stars matters to me because, although I�ve
never been charged with any crime and I am trying to make
something of myself, I am stopped by the police at least once
a month. Every single month. Sometimes, they pull me over
and jump out of the van screaming and shining their torches
in my face like they�re in the army. Once I was pulled over
because � and this is genuinely the reason the police officer
gave me � my friend had his hood up and I was wearing a hat
when we were driving in my car. I didn�t know that was a crime
and if I was white it probably wouldn�t have been. It matters
because more than once a police officer has said to me �see,
we�re not all bad� when they�ve treated me fairly. As if I should
be grateful. What does that tell you, when they�re saying that
about themselves?
It matters because constantly being stopped and searched
by the police is tiring. Because I hate that feeling, I really do.
Because I wish it would stop, but I know it never will. And
because every time it happens, I have to bite my tongue and be
polite, because they would love it if I wasn�t. It matters because I can recognise the undercover police cars in my area on sight.
It matters because I�ve started to feel like the police want to
keep us down. Because I can tell they�re disappointed when
yet again they don�t find evidence of any crime. When I tell
them I have a clothing brand and show them the clothes in the
boot of my car, they don�t care. I can feel that they don�t like
my ambition.
Rare Rising Stars matters because, just the other day, me and
Jack went to the Pepys Estate, just around the corner from my
house. We wanted to go somewhere with an inspiring view
because we were having a deep talk about Raw Arm and
whether we thought we should try again. As we sat on the
bench looking out over the water, trying to find the inspiration
to change our lives, the police approached us and asked what
we were doing there. We told them we were looking at the
view. They told us we couldn�t. They stopped and searched
us because we were sat, in the middle of the day, looking at
the view and trying to fix our lives. And then they told us to
go home.
It matters because we�re going to try again anyway. And
because I dream of going into property and setting up an
upscale Caribbean restaurant. With waiter service. Because
if I ever made a lot of money, I would fix up the whole of
Deptford � every shop would look new. Because one day,
when I�ve made it, I�d like the police to stop me and I would
like to tell them that I come from New Cross, and look at what
I�ve achieved.
Rare Rising Stars matters because when my mum saw a black
man driving a Bentley the other day, she came home and told
me. It matters because, one day, I hope she won�t feel the need.
Most of all, it matters because Rare Rising Stars is a book full
of black men driving Bentleys, and I want everybody to see that
book. And because, next time I�m stopped by the police, I can
show them this article, and I will be more than just a black face
in a hood. I will be a black man, and I�ll be driving a Bentley.